The Other Brother

On April 20th I wrote in my journal about a dream I had the night before.

"I had a dream last night. It began with Francis Chan dressed in clothes, blue, with a bigger head and a small body. He was riding on a n animal narrating the story. There was a creature, brown, small, about the size of a medium dog. he had antlers that looked like a sling shot and another straight branch that connected them.

He was a wise, experienced, yet young creature...one of his kind amongst the kingdom. He got kicked out for some reason and was shunned. He roamed the hilly dessert and wandered hoping to be of use and share his knowledge and experiences.

Suddenly he saw an animal that looked like him except there was fire coming from his slingshot antlers. Flameless he got alert and anxious. More and more appeared until he was surrounded by a  thick blanket of these similar flame holding creatures. How would he defend himself? The creatures starred at him curiously as if waiting for direction. They slung fire from their antlers in nervousness to the flameless creature's reaction.

They calmed down and wanted guidance and to learn from their 'other brother.' He began to show them how to survive...by spreading apart plants and retrieving the bug beetles that lived inside so they could eat them. Up the black bug lept and into the creatures mouths. Technique after technique as the other brother led them and made an army strong to defend their kingdom. Then I woke up. "

Peculiar.

The past three sermons I have listened to have all been focused on making disciples. Two happened to be by Francis Chan and one by Tommy Nelson. I knew God was pressing it on my noggin. I flipped to a place in my journal where I had written out this dream and had sketched a picture of the reddish brown haired creature with black eyes. I remember the dream being very colorful, insightful, as if something was being explained and revealed.

All sorts of interpretations could be made I suppose, but what stuck with me last night was like the creature, followers of Christ are sometimes out-casted, we look different to people, and sometimes His ways are shunned because people don't see or can't understand yet. We are creatures wandering in the desert, kicked out of the 'earthly' kingdom. But we are called to disciple others. To pour out what we know of Jesus and teach others not only who He is, but how to live as he commands us to. We are called to do this even when it's scary and we feel weak and unequipped because we don't have flames coming out our antlers to protect ourselves. We do have the belt of truth on though and the Word as our sword.

"Then Jesus came to them and said, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age." ~Matthew 28:18-20

I don't know where the branched slingshots came from, the bobble-head Francis Chan, or what the black beetle bugs represented...but it was so vivid I felt led to draw it last night even though all I wanted to do was go to bed. All the dots lined up into a constellation that spelt out....'make disciples.' Raise up the Lord's army, equip, teach, share wisdom and truth. Maybe it was just another wild dream I had, but I doubt it. Only God knows :)

Side by Side

This is the second time I drove by these horses and they were standing side by side like this...just chilling. I guess it's their favorite spot. "Meet me in the middle of the feild...our place...2pm...be there...but dont make eye contact with me."

Feild of Sunflowers

Back in 6th grade my room was decorated head to toe in sunflowers...wallpaper, bedspread, furniture, curtains. I went overboard. Don't know what the draw to them were. I do recall a popular perfume that all the 6th grade girls were wearing called 'Sunflowers' which I actually still have some remnants of under my sink. I spritzed it on a few months ago randomly...don't know how long perfume stays good but I feel like it smelt the same as it did 16 years ago.

I teach a class of 3 & 4 year olds. I get a new batch of kiddos every week and we study a particular country. A couple weeks ago we talked about Holland where Vincent van Gogh was born. He painted sunflowers and one of our projects for the week was a canvas painting/collage to replicate van Gogh's masterpiece. It was a process using clay, dyed coffee filters with watercolors & eyedroppers, tissue paper vases, oil pastels, and modge podge....and lots of direction. They all had their own original touches as all artists and people do.

I sometimes make treats for the kids receptions on Fridays to reflect our theme. Last week koala bear cupcakes for Australia and this time Sunflower cookies with chocolate centers. That week I was also inspired to make some sunflower pops to stick in cupcakes.

Sunflowers have kept popping up since then in random places and have been on my mind so today I looked them up on the Internet to further understand these bright rays of flower species and to satisfy my strange and recent images.

SUNFLOWER: "What is usually called the flower is actually a head (formally composite flower) of numerous florets (small flowers) crowded together." The outer florets are the yellow part and the inner florets mature into seeds. They are arranged in a spiral pattern by the 'golden angle' 137.5 degrees which then layout a pattern of spirals of the Fibonacci numbers....which are a sequence of numbers by which the two numbers previous add up to produce the next number like 1,1,2,3,5,8,13,21 and so on. This makes the most efficient packing seed arrangement and a really cool design.

I look at this design and see God's fingerprints all over it. The detail, the shapes, the finite precision of lines. It's immaculate. A bunch of small flowers inside a big flower. Genius. So I look at and see this...we are all these seeds in the middle of this bigger flower. God and all creation are the bright yellow pedals...the big picture. We are all clustered around each other with a specific purpose, a specific design, a specific Fibonacci location in life, at specific angles on earth at all times. God's most efficient packing system...most effective and glorifying design.We are the maturing seeds. Maturing, being sanctified daily by the Holy Spirit to grow to be more like Christ. Jesus is the starter seed, at the center of everything, the very beginning. The Fibonacci sequence of who we are and our existence can't start without Him. He is that initial seed which is watered within us after we are aware of Him and what He did for us on the cross. And we are in the middle of the bright yellow pedals, the bigger flower. As we mature we look more and more like the big picture of Jesus...the big bright sunflower.

"In the beginning was the Word, and the word was with God, and the Word was god. He was with God in the beginning. through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. In him was life, and that life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it." ~John 1: 1-4.

So when I see a feild of sunflowers...I know all of those grew out of One seed even though I can't see it under the dirt I know it's there...and because of that seed, I can see the feild of sunflowers. I can see the glory of God, the big picture because of that seed....Jesus.

"We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father full of grace and truth." ~John 1-14

If we know the Lord Jesus Christ we should be walking around like big sunflowers. Our brightness should be a reflection of His pedals. We were asked the other night by Robert what Jesus means to each of us...how we would describe Him. For me...He is in the details. He is the center. The focus of everything in my path and being. The glue that holds everything together, the bridge to God and truth, the first stroke of a design, the beginning number of the Fibonacci sequence, the inspiration for van Gogh's paintings and my cookies. Everything points to Him and He is connected to everything. I mean everything...even Sunflowers!Think about it next time your spitten' out sunflower seed shells into a cup or sprinkling them on your lunch salad :)

Freedom Weekend

Another 4th here and gone, but not without a little delight in the mix.

FRIDAY:

I never get to see firework shows. I always have these grand plans to see them and it never pans out. A flat tire leaving Lubbock made us miss the show in San Marcos. Had to work at the river another time. And the list goes on. I'm lucky if I get to hold a few sparklers. Last Friday night I was driving back from Dallas late and I happen to see big burst of fireworks lighting up the sky as I kicked it down the highway. One after the other. As I pulled towards my exit about 20 cars lined the shoulder of the highway with their emergency lights flashing. I zipped in right between them, parked, laid back my seat, and watched the show over the lake.  Pop pop pops blasted in the blackness above. The finale. ah. It was a little hug from God that night. An unplanned firework show in person...away from all the crowds...reflected in the lake water...in the quietness of the spontaneous moment...minus the gusts from the 70mph cars swaying Dottie (my suv).

SATURDAY:
Off to Glen Rose with Kylee. We picked the location last minute from a suggestion my brother had given me. We were headed to Dinosaur Valley to go hiking for the day. About an hour + 1/2 outside of Dallas. Bananas, camera, map, bible, Gatorade and water lined our backpacks. Arriving we stopped at a gas station...which inside was actually a bakery where they made cakes and pastries. Small towns. I chuckled. Making wedding cakes inside a gas station...why not? You can get $20 bucks of unleaded gas and a birthday cake...sweet deal.

Off to Dino Valley. We get a map and park. It mists a little on us, but feels good from the humidity that was seeping into our day. We set out and walk down a trail that leads to a river. Surely we don't cross the river to get to the trails? Yep. A nice man whom has been hiking these parts before and his dog Shamrock told us the way. We took off our shoes, held hands to keep from falling from the rocky and slippery terrain, and made it victoriously across the river.

Pick a trail, any trail, red, blue, orange, white. the paths were marked by colors...usually painted on a tree or a prominent rock all along the way. We started off with white which took us up into the hills and by a couple steep drop offs. I get dizzy at even being close to an open edge so we veered off to another direction (Thanks Kylee for understanding and coaching me on.) It was peaceful and nice to be active. The rains came in sporadic spouts and it was lovely. Just enough to keep us cool and refreshed. Crazy flying insects, cobwebbs, cacti, fireants, sweat and mudd. Gotta love nature.

We got confused with our map and at that moment our previous friend appeared and pointed us to the right trail. We walked down a rocky path with stones. I said to Kylee, "this makes me think of the Matthew parable about a seed falling on a rocky path." We thought about the other seeds being thrown on the path where the birds ate it quickly, onto the thorns and thistles where it gets chocked out, and onto the good soil where it produces good crop....the one on the rocky path is on little soil and gets scorched by the sun. We couldn't remember all of it, so I busted out my bible and we read it as we walked down the rocky pathway. Hiking through live examples of God's word.

"When anyone hears the message about the kingdom and does not understand it, the evil one comes and snatches away what was sown in his heart. this is the seed sown along the path. The one who received the seed that fell on rocky places is the man who hears the word and at once receives it with joy. But since he has no root, he lasts only a short time. When trouble or persecution comes because of the word, he quickly falls away. The one who received the seed that fell among the thorns is the man who hears the word but worries of this life and the deceitfulness  of wealth choke it making it unfruitful. But the one who received the seed that fell on the good soil is the man who hears the worked and understands it. He produces a crop yielding a hundred, sixty , or thirty times what is sown."
~Matthew 13:19-23

We made our way back to the river, took our shoes off again, crossed it holding hands, and got back in the car. We went to the sight of the park where there were dinosaur tracks. Not too impressed with what we saw...but we had to check it out since were were in Dinosaur Land. Afterwards we headed to the historic Glen Rose square and got a coffee from the Jitter Coffee House and inside I found a vintage lamp for sale. It was huge...green glass bottom, and a shade that was half the size of me...and cheap! I'm redecorating my room and I had found a gem. The owner said she got it at an estate sale in Plano, Tx. Did not expect to come home with a lamp and a sunburn. "I love Lamp." Leaving the square we listened to my GPS Carla to direct us. Recaclulating. Recaculating. Echoed in the background as I contiuosly took my own scenic path and ignored Carla's voice. She led us to Grace Street. I of course without missing a beat, put the car in park, jumped out of the drivers seat and took a snapshot. This is God's roadmap. STOP and take the narrow street of GRACE in life through Christ...a little reminder. We ended up back at that cake shop gas station and I got a caramel Blondie coconut pastry, $1.50. YUM. Back on the road....Dallas bound.

SUNDAY:

I made a 4th of July dessert. I call it:

FRUIT OF THE SPIRIT SURPRISE

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control." ~Galatians 5:22-23

• Blueberries
• Strawberries
• vanilla pudding
• whipping cream
• lady fingers
• vanilla wafers
• gram cracker crust
• butter
• powdered sugar
• sweetened condensed milk
• Cool whip

HAPPY 4th of JULY!

I'm A Describer

Definition:

DESCRIBE

• To convey an idea or impression of, characterize
• To give an account of in speech or writing
• To represent pictorially; depict
• To trace the form or outline of

Synonyms: narrate, recite, recount, relate, report.


I had an epiphany last night after reading in Jeremiah 10. I was writing some notes on it and got one line in...and picked up my journal instead. What are your real reasons Ashley for learning scripture, reading the bible, and seeking wisdom and knowledge of who God is? What is the purpose? If I gained all this 'stuff' that I knew in my head and my heart...what am I uniquely suppose to do with it all? I know we are called to share it....but everyone hears things so different, everyone communicates so different...how am I suppose to share it with people...I am not fluent in speaking with people I don't know and even those I do.  "Make Him the focus....the eye in the sky...whom I am DESCRIBING." The word 'describing' which I journaled resonated in my head. OH. I was made to Describe who Jesus is to people. I am gifted at describing things....relating...connecting...representing. I have always seen something and connected it to something else...that's how my mind works. It's a describing train...the boxcars being words, pictures, feelings, ideas.

God made my purpose a little more clear last night...to desrcibe this mystery of the gospel in all avenues of my life whether in....painting, photography, music, writing, cake, and on and on...wherever else He takes me. I knew all my talents were connected to Him, but when put in terms of DESCRIBING Him to the world instead of the words telling...sharing...explaining...talking...speaking...etc...it came full circle and really made sense to me. In painting I describe whats going on in my soul through color and images. In music I describe through emotion and an inner cry/connection. In photography I describe the essence and splendor of a moment. In writing I describe with relating, words, emotion, experiences, ideas and thoughts. With cake I describe with creation, color, senses, and joy. In all aspects of life....if I can deny myself from living in the flesh (flesh meaning my own desires as a human when I'm not filled with the spirit )....and be so in tune and one with His heartbeat and will...then I should be describing Him fully in all I do, make, say, create. Loving someone well by sacrificing my time or whatever I put aside is a reflection of His love...it's a form of describing him to another person...even without words or explanation. Describing Him is a train with endless boxcars...Jesus is in the Engine AND at the Caboose.

,
"He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. For by him all things were created; things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. He is before all things, and in him all things hold together."
 ~Colossians 1:15-17


I was always looking for and running to the Chief Engineer heading up the cars running the show. I didn't realize He was at the beginning and the end. He's the image. God is invisible and I have to describe Jesus' image. He is in all things and everything points back to the cross...so I have to describe that. Maybe that is how and why I understand my Savior so visibly. It is this gift He has given me of connecting things--->images...emotions...truths...experiences...people....ideas...thoughts....And since He is in all things...connecting everything back to Him makes complete sense to me. It flows...it congeals...it all lines up. God has described Jesus to me...now I get to describe Jesus to others. What an awesome thing to get to describe...especially when everything and I mean everything points to Him....He is the glue that holds us all together....He is the butter in the cake mix...He is the essential ingredient.


So when people ask me what I do for a living....maybe I'll say..."I'm a Describer."

YET

Habakkuk.
hmm. funny word. sounds like something a animal might quack out. It's not an animal cackle, it's a book in the Old Testament. Root word in Hebrew meaning "embrace." Well that's much prettier isn't it?

It's a short book, 3 chapters..2 & an inkblot pages long in my bible wedged between Nahum and Zephaniah (haha, now that word sounds like a sneeze...God Bless You). I don't have a recollection of ever reading this. I found it to be full. Habakkuk was a prophet, a countryman of Judah. Basically he is asking God some really straight up questions like 'Where you at...when are you gonna show up...how long...why are you runnin the show this way?' And God responds by saying basically 'watch what I do and be amazed, wait, and I'll handle it in my time and way.' My favorite part was at the end where Habakkuk says "YET I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior." He's like..."even though fig trees don't bud and the vines are grapeless and the pens are sheepless and all the cows have taken a vacation which means no hamburgers for Friday night dinners...Yet everything around me is all dried up...and it doesn't make sense...I rejoice." I love the word YET in the passage. Yet all this...I don't care...whatever...I trust you Lord. FAITH. good stuff. Pretty sure we can all learn a lesson from that and apply it to our life. I tell myself...suck it up and rejoice...I don't have to understand now...the beauty of it all is YET to come!

"His splendor was like the sunrise; rays flashed from his hand, where his power was hidden." ~Habakkuk 3:4
 

This reminded me of a painting I did a while back when I was 'searching' for the Lord. I painted a hand with rays flashing out from it. Didn't know what all the images and thoughts in my head meant at the time and still don't completely. I remember I felt a battle between my mind and my heart and the only way I could explain it was to paint it. God was saying...'stop thinking so much...stop trying to make sense of everything and analyze me and life...just believe and all will be added to you.' Hence the cross jabbing through the brain in the painting....the battle. It's like I couldn't walk up those steps through the door to see the otherside until I LET GO and just trusted Him with everything. Then I had eyes to see what I had been trying to figure out the whole time. Jesus was the bridge, the key, the connecting point to the mystery of this power to live free and understand.

 Anywho...when I was reading this scripture in Habakkuk on Monday it triggered a memory of the hand I painted. The next morning I was teaching my preschool art class and we were making Australian hand print paintings where they would make lines or 'rays' coming from their hand and the scripture popped in my head.  And a funny added bonus last night...a slide show of pictures arrived on my computer screen saver...and the second photo...there it was...the painting.
Back then I didn't understand who Jesus was YET...or how he was/is connected to everything in my life, in the universe, in all creation. I was like Chapter 1 & 2 Habakkuk...asking questions...trying to get answers from God...about what was going on around me and inside me...challenging and questioning what I didn't get or what didn't make sense to my human mind or worldly views I had collected on my shelf along with intellect and experiences...I let those things define who God was to me instead of letting God reveal to me who He really is. Oh what a lengthy mistake I dragged with me all those years. The truth was sitting under my nightstand in a green covered book entitled "Holy Bible" which made me cringe back then everytime I thought about opening it. The mysterious power...this power that flashes in rays from God's hand, I realized I never let penetrate my heart...I only looked at it from afar like a firework show. How much more dazzeling to be in the sky right next to the lights. It took the Chapter 3 Habakkuk perspective to open my eyes. Throw up my hands. Rejoice, have faith in the unknown...have faith in Jesus Christ and trust who the word says He is, who God says he is...and just believe that...then wait...and watch...and be utterly amazed. And so I did...and I was amazed...and I still am...and I continue to be...flash by flash...yet by yet.

"For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God."~Colossians 3:3

HIDDEN...with Christ...in God...
Like in the earlier scripture ...'rays flashed from his hand, where his power was HIDDEN." ~Habakkuk 3:4

God's power is hidden in His hand...Christ is in God's hand, He is the power...and we who put our faith in Christ and lose our lives for him...this mysterious faith...are hidden with him...in God's hand.

Habakkuk.

EMBRACE.




DAILY DOSE

Okay so this is neither here nor there. Just some funny things the kids did today. This is a class of 3 and 4 year olds so you can imagine the ridiculousness that takes place in that room.

*QUESTION: What snack did you bring today?
  ANSWER: Gram-crappers.

* A little boy had a costume horse head on today. He paced back and forth walking towards the wall...touching it with his horse nose...then pivot turned and paced about 15 feet touching the horse nose to the room support beam...over and over he repeated the process over and over. I watched him for a good minute.

SHOE POLISH FOR THE SOUL

Ditch the morning latte...A Loving way to spend your $3.

I was in Dallas last week at a stoplight and I read a bumper sticker on a car in front of me that said "God is Pro Life." I thought yes He is...which led to thinking other things. Like... 'that's cool that person has a bumper sticker that proclaims that statement for other people to see. It's cool that person is being bold and isn't afraid of what others think. Man, why aren't there more things in this city in front of my face that I can look at about God...about Jesus? Why are there all these other words, advertisements, and visuals to look at, but no truth to look at? Why don't we have scripture on our cars?" Ding ding ding...we have a winner. What if all the believers in this city wrote the word of God on their cars with shoe polish. Can you imagine?? Well I imagined it...and it's awesome. Think about how many people see your car a day...going to work--->coming back from work--->going to the gym--->at the drivethru--->at stoplights--->ummm everywhere. Then multiply that and think of how many eyeballs would gaze at the WORD OF GOD if all your family did it, your friends, your community group, your church.

When you are on your way to the grocery store for milk...those who don't know Jesus and those who do know Jesus will be parked behind your bumper. Let's share what our eyes have seen and our ears have heard with people...let's not keep this hope just to ourselves that Christ has given us. Let's give light to it. Isaiah 55:11 says: "So is the word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it." Who knows what God would do in someone's life...or what person He will make your car cross paths with that day. Maybe...encourage, save, lift up, comfort, give hope, restore, speak to, give wisdom and understanding, change hearts, give peace, love?


So...yesterday I heard the calling again and I turned into the grocery store and bought a $2.99 stick of white liquid shoe polish. As I was pulling out of the parking lot I started having doubts and all these scenes played out in my head of people persecuting me for it...BUT THEN...a red truck passed in front of me slowly and in the corner of the windshield on the bottom right hand side was a big smiley face :) written in..that's right...Shoe polish. It was like God was giving me the thumbs up...waving the flag to push toward the goal...and smiling at me. I got home and was searching in my bible for a chosen scripture and the first one I flipped to was blocked off in a pen marking. Matthew 24:9. My eyes caught it and it read, "Then you will be handed over to be persecuted and put to death, and yo u will be hated by all nations because of me."  Well that is okay I thought. I expect that. I am going to ACTS 20:24 this thing and keep trucking. I got a scripture from a note card I had taped on my mirror, Romans 5:8. "But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." I painted the letters onto my SUV's back windshield. The words speak for themselves, I don't have to do anything except press the gas.


This morning I felt humble as I drove to work at 8 am. Traffic on either side, in front, and behind me. I wondered who was reading it. I wondered as I switched lanes who I would be in front of next. Who had God aligned for my white Kia Dottie to pass or slow down in front of? Who walked by it in the parking lot today? Did a little kid sitting in the backseat ask their mom who Christ was and what the words meant on the car? Was there a believer who was having a bad morning and then became hopeful after reading that...remembering God's love for them? So many hopeful scenarios...I'll never know....and I think that's the cool thing about it...because God gets all the glory, we aren't in control of the people who see or don't see it...He is...therefore we can not boast. "Offer yourselves to God, as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer the parts of your body to him as instruments of righteousness." ~ Romans 6:13 Be His instrument. Let your car be an instrument for righteousness.

So...anyone who has 3 bucks laying around...buy a stick of shoe polish and choose a scripture to share with God's people. Proclaim Him boldly on your car like that one person did with a bumper sticker in a creative way. Get your family, friends, community group to do it with you. We as people who have been blessed by Him to know the mystery of the gospel have a responsibility and longing to share that love with others of  this eternal and glorious hope that Jesus brings to all who know Him. "I am not ashamed of the gospel because it is the power of god for the salvation of everyone who believes." Romans 1:16. Join in on sharing the gospel with your city...one shoe polish scripture at a time. I'm going to switch it up every week I think. Acts 20:24 "However I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me---the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace.""

WARNING-SIDE EFFECTS: Putting scripture on the back of your car may make you into a more graceful and kind driver. (knowing I was representing the Lord today while behind the wheel caused me to not drive as fast or cut anybody off)

My So Called Life

Revamping my blogging habits and crossing over from writing about cakes and bridging over to the spoonfuls of the sweet life God pours out in front of my eyes everyday. This blog used to be for my business Icing & Aprons and it's sister blog is still up and running http://www.icingandapronsblog.com/ . After weeks and months of thoughts, stories, and revelations I've decided today to layout the roads being paved out in my mind and put these tire tracks to paper...well I guess it would be...to the computer screen and keyboard. I couldn't figure out what to title this blogging adventure. Then like the wind blows, my favorite TV series growing up as a teenager swirled into my head, "My So Called Life."


This was a TV show about a high school girl growing up going through all those typical high school experiences. Angela played by Claire Danes was a character I was intrigued by as I instinctively cuddled up to her misfit corks that I related to. Reserved, quiet, dreamer, observer, disconnected, thinker...not typical. Not to mention the guy she adored was Jordan Catallano, an equally mysterious loner who wore a skinny black leather choker around his neck...a fashion statement I found myself replicating for years. I liked Angela's perspective on life, her search for meaning in everything and her deep awareness and questions for life that surpassed the everyday worldly views and trendy topics. Between her and Keri Russell's artsy college character in "Felicity" I found comfort in meshing with their seemingly normal outer shell appearance and strange inside soul. They were different and it was okay...I didn't feel alone. Until that is I faced that..they were TV characters.


Well I'm not Angela, and I'm not Felicity...I'm Ashley. Through trucking around these years and making my own tracks...I've come to a place of being 'okay' with who I am...not based on any fictional character or script. I'm at this place by the grace of God and through the acceptance of Jesus Christ. My life apart from Christ is a road map of overlapping and cris cross tire tracks...a jumbled up mess...dead ends, U-turns, empty tanks, and wrecks (I have no idea how this car analogy has come into play...but here it is VROOM).


I always wanted to embrace my inner hippie and rent a van and take off down the road and drive cross country until the vehicle broke down or I missed my family too much. I could experience the unknown, capture snapshots of my adventure, take river baths, spit unrythmic annoying tunes from a harmonica, and eat beef jerky for dinner...in this whimsical hope of one day documenting and sharing stories of my wild foot prints around America..or Europe.


Well, in some weird way...I'm living that dream and desire. Jesus has allowed me through the power of the Holy Spirit to go where the wind takes me, to experience this mystery of the unknown, and dive into the rivers of change and freedom. I am taking snapshots of these moments...of these times and I'm using myself as a harmonic instrument for God. I am at a new 'state-line' every week it feels like. Growing, seeing, learning, loving, forgiving, embracing, allowing change, walking in purpose.


So here I am. I came to a stoplight in life with a fork in the road. I chose the narrow path to life and threw up the duces to the wide path that leads to destruction. Jesus is now in the truck driver's seat hands on the wheel and I'm chilling next to Him with a skinny black choker around my neck, chompin down on a stick of beef jerkey. It's the best road trip I've ever been on and the only one with a clear and purposeful destination. I'm one happy hippie. So through the lens of God's video camera and His script....this is my so called life.

Smore on a Stick

These little guys I made for my community group for Christmas. We all went to serve a family and I thought since everyone was putting so much effort into helping this family for Christmas they all deserved a treat as well.

I was shopping for presents earlier that day and I walked into one of my favorite boutiques in Rowlett, Chubby Cherub. I was purchasing my gifts, and I noticed white desserts that looked like chocolate covered somethings...perhaps marshmellows I thought. I grabbed one and took a bite. Yep. (They always have something to snack on there or coffee to sample...a small perk that makes me happy).

The cashier was telling me how they were selling them on a stick at a Whole Foods or Central Market for like 4 Bucks each. I asked if the stick was edible and she said no. Well the wheels turned...PRETZELS.

My community group from church hangs out all the time and on the weekends we are usually at the guys place. They have a fireplace, so we park a couple living room chairs in front of it and make S'mores inside. This has been a weekly tradition for about a month now. So when I heard of S'mores on a stick it was fitting.

Here are the STEPS for a complete edible treat you can make your special someones:

#1 String on 2 large marshmellows on a jumbo pretzel stick...you can buy these at your local grocery store. The marsmellows grip the prezels perfectly becuase the stickiness inside acts like a glue.

#2 Take something big and get all your aggression out by smashing gram crackers into a million peices. You can add some sparkle by putting your favorite sprinkles in the mix.

#3 Melt Hershey's Chocolate candy bars in the Microwave. Don't eat it!!

#4 Roll your marshmellow stick in the chocolate so it is completly covered. Using a spoon helps. After it goes for it's chocolate bath, immediatly sprinkle it with your gram cracker crumbs...well pour it on actually. Lay it on some wax paper to dry.

#5 You can put them in the fridge if you are in a rush, otherwise just let the chocolate harden in room temprature. Once they dry, melt some colored chocolate and drizzle over the top for some pazzaz!

#6 Let them dry and wrap them in plastic baggies, throw in a few small marshmellows and tie with a lil bow or twisty tie of your choice. I made some cards with blank note cards folded in half, a stamp, a hole punch, scalloped scissors. They each had a quote from William Shakespeare & a note inside for each of my friends. You can go as crazy as you want with your details to make it unique.

I was in charge of the dessert to bring the family we were serving for Christmas, so I made a strawberry & cream cheese cake with bright red polk-a-dots. But since I had some marshmellows left over I also made them some chocolate covered puffs. These were the same process but I used lolli pop sticks and toasted the marshmellows in the oven on Low Broil. Toast the puffs BEFORE you insert the stick. Use melted chocolate to secure the sick if needed. I decorated them with Sprinkles. Once everything was dry, I arranged them in jar using marshmellows and gramcrackers to fill in the gaps. The small marshmellows were worked perfectly holding the sticks in place. Tie a bow around it and your DONE!

We got to provide a Christmas dinner, dessert, beds, & presents for the family that night. It was such an honor to be the hands and feet of Christ and share our blessings with a family that was going through a rough patch. Serving with my friends was a blessing in itself & so thankful to be apart of a group of people that put others needs before their own. Love yall.

Here is to S'MORE LOVE & SWEETS in 2010!!!!

Small Blessings

On October 16th, 2009, I woke up early to make some cupcakes. I didn't have time to make my usual cake from scratch so I went to the grocery store to pick up a few items like powdered sugar, and some vanilla cake mix. I have found that store-bought cake mixes aren't that bad if you are in a pinch. They always come out moist & have that signature "birthday cake" flavor. But that is here nor there when it comes to this story.


I was stressed out this day. I was tired, broke,...& honestly I did not want to be making cake. I wanted to be nestled in my bed while my box fan blasted as background noise. But God gave me a little reminder of His grace & love that engergized me for this particular morning.

I went to the baking aisle and gathered my ingredients. Six boxes of Pillsbury cake mix. As I was making my way to the express checkout counter...carefully looking to make judgements of who would be the speediest cashier & swiper...I noticed a farely large black woman in one of those moterized carts looking at me. I had chosen the line to the right of her and I figured she was starring at me thinking.."I should be in that line, she's gonna get checked out before me. "

So I pulled up into my line, where a enthusiastic black woman was helping the other customer infront of me. She was so polite, and just happy, with a big smile on her face, and just talking to her customer like they'd been friends forever. I swear she would have started dancing if there would have been a good ringtone going off.

Well the tired part of me really wanted to be annoyed at this lady for being so full of life so early in the day...but I wasn't. I remember thinking, 'how does she have so much joy right now...oh she must be a believer.' I could sense Christ's love pouring from her & it tickled me.

Well at this point I noticed that other big woman in the next line was still starring at me. I thought, man she really wants my place in line. And as I got greeted with a very joyful welcome by my cashier, the large black woman got my cashiers attention and handed her some paper & pointed at me.

She had given me 6 coupons for Pillsbury cake mix, knocking the price down to .40 cents each. My cashier seemed as thrilled as I was saying, "well look at that, look at that." I kept thanking the lady from a distance realizing now, what all the starring had meant. She wanted to give me something I didn't even know I wanted...or deserved.

Me and my cashier were now discussing the small, but great gift of this annonomous stranger's generousity.


I said, "Well talk about being at the right place at the right time."


I paused & said, "Small blessings."


She looked at me and announced, "You must know the Lord." in a kindered excitement.


I responded with a smile, "I do."


She gave me a high five and said "yep, there's no such thing as coincedences. The Lord is good. Isn't He good!"


I told her, " I knew you knew Him before I even talked with you, I could just tell."


"Our spirits are intune with eachother's. That's right. Isn't that something!"...as she kept shaking her head and smiling from ear to ear.


"I know, I know; you can just tell." I affirmed.

I'm sure the people behind me were like, what are these two crazy ladies talking about...and why are they so giddy with excitment...all it is, is a few dang coupons. Well all I can say is her joy woke me up from my slumber and got me out of my bad mood...& then the faithfullness & grace of God blessed me with something so simple but wonderful as $2.40 off of cake mix from a complete stranger...that I and this check out lady were filled with the holy spirit & just so thrilled to glorify God in those few moments of His devine intervention.

I can't make this stuff up. It's just so cool how God plans every last detail. From me arriving to the grocery store at that exact time... picking out 6 ..cake mixes...to coming to the line just in time for that woman to give me 6 cake mix coupons...not just any coupons..but the brand of mix I had, Pillsbury...to having me have a spirit filled conversation with a sister in Christ...someone to witness and experience that small blessing with me and not let it go unnoticed, cause He knows how much I get a kick out of that.

I mean what if I had gotten there 1 minute later...or I picked out Duncan Hines cake mix instead of Pillsbury...or I needed 10 instead of 6...or I had chose to go to the 3rd line over instead of the 2nd one. I mean seriously................................it's got God's name & creativity & Jesus's love & selflessness written all over it. WOW. If you let God be cool, he sure does define the word for you in ways you just can't think up on your own & ways you don't even know will thrill you. Take notice & seek it, and He will show up.

As I left I said "thank-you so much" to the woman in the moterized cart one last time. I got in my car and started driving down the highway..and kept kicking myself as to why I didn't go over and give that woman a huge hug because I so wanted to, or helped her to her car. I prayed that I would run into her again...so hopefully I'll be at Walmart one day and I can return God's love that she showed to me.

So even though I was tired and being a brat in the morning, God showed up & I noticed. He gave me another glimpse of who He is and humbly reminded me that I don't deserve that person's kind gesture, He gave it to me anyways because of His grace & love. And I thought...omg, i'ts just like how He gave His son as a gift to me to take away my sin & brokeness, hurt, constant search for this freedom & fullfillment, so I could really reunite with God.

And taking it to the next level I thought....It would have been rude of me to say..."No thank you...I don't need your coupons...I have enough money, I can pay for it myself." Of course not...I choose to take it, cause it's FREE, it benefits me, & it is this act of accepting another's love simply because they are giving it to us out of love that makes sense to our heart...accepting this coupon called grace, a gift I don't deserve....JESUS CHRIST's SACRAFICE. By accepting the coupon, I am returing love to the giver...saying I appreciate your gesture & I need & want your love in my life....I want that $2.40 off my cake mix...and I didn't even realize it until after I accepted your coupon. How nieve & silly of me to wonder why you were starring at me...when you just wanted to give me a gift. (do you see where I'm goin with this?)

God put's these random senarios all around us, all the time, all woven in each and every one of our lives to get our attention, to show who He is & that He wants you. He is just waiting for us to accept His coupon...accept His Son....So that He can be re-united to us & pour own more and more and more of his limitless love. Just take notice. Keep your eyes peeled & your hearts open...ask, wait and watch it unfold....because He is starring down from heaven at each one of us...trying to give us His Coupon.

Just had to share that story, it made my morning and the rest of the day for that matter.

There is nothing quite like......small blessings.

Later Gators
~AShley Marie

Have a sweet day and be filled with His sweet spirit.